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Milestones Schmilestones

October 28, 2009

I’m sure I’m not the only mother in the world who has to audibly tell herself to stop worrying sometimes. Lately, these worries have been centering around the fact that Evangeline is not really rolling over. She CAN roll over and has done it before, but it’s not consistent at all. Most of the time she kinda flounders around on the floor and plays and then proceeds to turn herself in circles on her tummy. I am trying not to worry about this but when you have stupid books like What to Expect in the First Year using words like should and will be able to and important milestone, it’s hard not to worry. So I did what any self-respecting mother would do in this situation…I threw the book away. It’s sitting in my recycling can right now.

These books are only here, I am convinced, to make us PARANOID! As if mothers need something else to worry about beyond getting enough sleep, wearing matching shoes, having food in the refrigerators, our paying jobs, not killing your kids (or your partner at times), etc. And yet, these kind of books have become the standard of parenting in our present day culture.
When did we stop trusting ourselves as fairly capable people who have instincts? These instincts are so repressed that we have to obsessively read silly books and call our doctors about a silly thing like not rolling over? I say “we”, but maybe it is just “me”?


I know it’s been said time and time again, but it’s becoming my mantra until the recycling is taken out: EVERY BABY IS DIFFERENT. I was reminded of this in a restaurant the other day when there was another family there with a seven month old baby. We were chatting and she commented on how well Evangeline’s head control was. She said her daughter was barely holding her head up on her own but was rolling all over the place. Exactly. What one baby can do at a certain time another baby may not be able to. And that’s ok.

Again, it all comes down to trusting ourselves and our babies. She’ll roll over when she’s ready. In the meantime, I’m counting immobility as a blessing.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. October 29, 2009 10:00 am

    Way to go! I agree that every baby is different. Those “milestone reports” are so worry-inducing (and usually for no reason at all).

  2. October 29, 2009 11:08 am

    She is perfectly herself.

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